Getting used to daycare: The Berlin model explained simply

Your child's entry into daycare is a significant milestone – both in your child's life and in yours as a parent. This transition phase, often referred to as the settling-in period, is a crucial time during which your child learns to feel safe, secure, and comfortable in the new environment.

This comprehensive article provides you with detailed information and practical tips to help you and your child navigate this important phase as smoothly and positively as possible.

What does settling in mean?

Settling in refers to the individual process in which the child gradually adapts to the new environment, the caregivers, the other children, and the structured daily routine in the daycare center.

It is an emotional process of building trust. The child separates from their primary caregiver and forms a new, secure bond with the educational professionals. The duration of this process varies from child to child and can last from a few days to several weeks.

Why is settling in so important?

• Emotional security: A gentle and supported settling-in process allows the child to build trust with the caregivers and the new situation in an unfamiliar environment.

• Social integration: The child learns to integrate into a group, understand social rules, make friends, and develop important social and communication skills.

• Stress reduction: A structured, step-by-step transition minimizes the child's stress and separation anxiety and lays the foundation for a positive attitude towards daycare.

The Berlin Settling-In Model

The Berlin Settling-In Model is a scientifically sound approach and one of the best-known models in German daycare centers. It provides for a gradual, child-centered approach:

Basic Phase (Days 1 to 3)

A parent or familiar caregiver accompanies the child to the daycare center and stays with them there. The focus is on observation, initial contact with the assigned caregiver, and ensuring the child feels safe and secure. No separation takes place during this phase.

First separation attempt (after approx. 3 days)

The parent leaves the room for a very short time (a few minutes) but remains in the immediate vicinity. The child's reaction determines the duration and further course of the process.

Stabilization phase (approx. 4th to 6th day)

The duration of the daily separation is gradually increased, depending on the child's well-being. The primary caregiver takes on more of the caregiving responsibilities.

Final phase (from approx. 1 week)

The child spends the day at the daycare center (almost) without a parent present. However, a parent should be available at all times in case the child still needs more intensive support.

Important note: These timeframes are only guidelines. Your daycare center will adapt the plan individually to your child's needs.

Tips for a Successful Adjustment Process

Your role as a parent is invaluable during this phase.

• mCommunication is key: Talk positively about going to daycare. Explain to your child, in an age-appropriate way, what they will experience there and who will be caring for them. Read books about daycare.

• Consistency and reliability: Stick to a consistent routine during the adjustment phase (e.g., the same ritual when arriving and leaving). This provides your child with stability and security.

• Openness with the caregivers: Share all relevant information about your child's preferences, fears, habits (sleep, eating, rituals), and previous childcare experiences. This allows the professionals to better address your child's individual needs.

• Say goodbye intentionally: Never sneak away! Always say "goodbye," even if it's difficult and your child is crying. A clear farewell ritual is more honest and reinforces the trust that you will definitely come back.

• Patience: Take the pressure off. While some children only need a few days, others need several weeks. Plan a generous timeframe in advance (ideally 3 to 6 weeks during which you are flexible) to accommodate your child's pace.

Common Challenges and How to Overcome Them

Separation Anxiety and Crying

It is completely natural for your child to cry or not want to be separated from you in the first few days.

• Stay calm: Your own composure will transfer to your child.

• Offer brief and decisive comfort: Show understanding, but signal that you trust the process and will be back soon.

• Trust the professionals: The caregivers are trained to comfort and distract the child after the separation. The anxiety usually subsides as soon as the child is engrossed in play.

Changes in Behavior

• Understanding it as processing: This is a sign that the child is processing the new impressions and challenges. Give your child extra rest, closeness, and patience at home during this time.

• More routines: Maintain consistent evening and bedtime routines at home to provide your child with a sense of security.

Illnesses

• Children may get sick more often in the first few months at daycare because they come into contact with many new germs.

• Immune system training: This is normal and strengthens the immune system in the long run. Be prepared for your child to need to stay home more often during the first few months.

Be considerate: Never send your sick child to daycare to protect the other children and staff.

Conclusion

The settling-in period at daycare is a profound and important process that requires patience, understanding, and open communication. As parents, you should know that it is perfectly normal for your child to need time to adjust.

With your loving support, close and trusting communication with the caregivers, and an understanding of your child's individual needs, this transition phase will be successful and lay the foundation for a happy and fulfilling time at daycare.